If you consider yourself to be a close friend, please read and comment. I'd appreciate it.


I have been alive for 16 and 1/2 years.

I have been a member of DeviantArt for 1 and 1/2 years.

I have hated humanity for about 8 years.

I have been an 'A' student for 12 years.

I have been 5' 2 and 1/2" tall for 5 years.

I have been over 150lbs for 5 years.

I have loved swimming for 16 years.

I have been dating Justin, officially, for 106 days.

I have known Justin for about 7 months.

I realized who I am 2 months ago.

I have been drawing for 6 years.

I have been writing for 8 years.

I put on my mask 7 and 1/2 years ago.

I took off my mask to one person 6 days ago.

My thoughts turned dark 6 years ago.

I knew I'd never be able to take my own life 4 years ago.

I have loved reading for 14 years.

I learned how reading will take me away from reality 7 years ago.

I realized how distant I had become from my friends last year.

I never tried to return to the mindless banter of said friends because of all the drama.

I wonder how next school year will turn out, when the 9th graders become 10th graders and I see them in the halls after not having contact with them for an entire year. I can't help but wonder what groups they'll be in... and if I will join them.

I realize that the people I called friends before have drifted away to the point of being friendly acquaintences, leaving me in a netherworld of books, drawing, writing, homework and sleep.

I wonder if anyone still considers me a close friend like they did in mid/jr. high. If they do, I hope they let me know.

And here it is, my puny life displayed with my wonderings. and i realize now, that i am Jeh'rin, love of Suiraqua. That is who I choose to be forever.